Nobody surprised as greedy piece of s*** keeps stores open

To the surprise of absolutely nobody, the greedy piece of s*** that is Mike Ashley, and his merry band of leeches, have informed their staff that all stores within the Frasers Group, including Sports Direct and House of Fraser, will remain open, despite the government putting the UK on lockdown.

Earlier today, Prime Minister Boris Johnson urged all UK citizens to stay indoors due to the coronavirus pandemic save for one outdoor exercise session per day, travelling to work, or buying food or other essential supplies, even granting UK police powers to issue fines to those not abiding by social distancing rules.

He also stated that all non-essential retailers should shut down immediately, prompting the modern day Ebenezer Scrooge to claim that selling sportswear from the early 2000s and hiedous oversized mugs is an essential service that their poorly paid, poorly treated should absolutely risk their health and the health of their loved ones to provide.

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